Tuesdays with Morris

Yesterday I came across a passage while re-reading some of Matthew Paul Turner’s book “The Christian Culture Survival Guide” that made me ask the question, “What keeps people from walking out of church?”

He told a story of walking out in the midst of a sermon because he was utterly bored. He said he had great hopes because the first part of the service had been really good. Then came the sermon and he just couldn’t take it. So, he left. Just got up and walked out. He was bored…though he admits trying to stay, trying to pay attention. It just didn’t work. He made the comment that if he was in a boring movie, he’d leave…if he was watching a boring television program, he’d turn off the TV. He asks, “Why should church be any different?”

So, again, I wonder…what keeps people from walking out of church?

And, what can we do to keep people from wanting to walk out of church.

So, yesterday I pulled a totally idiotic move…

In attempting to cut a cable wrapped around a power cord, I grabbed one of my trusty Cutco knives (serrated edge, of course). Why this knife? Well, I couldn’t find the scissors and the knife set was right there. And, knowing how sharp these knives are, I was positive the cut would be fast and easy.

And, it was! However, in my overly zealous cutting, the knife managed to find it’s way to my knuckle on my left index finger. A jagged, deep cut! Lots of blood.

So, after bleeding for 4-5 hours, I decided that I was just going to wrap it up and have a doctor look at it at church in the morning. However, under the advice of my wife, I made my way to the emergency room.

Arriving at the registration desk, I found out that I would probably sit in the waiting room until 1am. That sounded ridiculous. So, I left.

In talking to my mother, she told me about a little “doc-in-a-box” outfit that could stitch me up.

I found my way to this facility. The nurse practitioner took one look at it and said, “Yeah, we need to close that up.”

Due to the location and depth of the cut, it was determined that it would be best to stitch it…otherwise I would end up breaking it open every time I use my hand.

They asked how I cut it…I told them it was while cutting a cable. They asked if I was splicing cable. I said, “No, but wouldn’t it make a more interesting story if I told you I had climbed up a pole and was splicing cable illegally from my neighbors?” It was agreed by all in the room that this would have been a more entertaining story.

So, here I sit, with three stitches. It’s kind of annoying. Kind of embarassing…three stitches??? But, I’m not bleeding anymore…so I’ve got that going for me.

Now, most of you know that I am diehard Heorot patron. However, last week I decided to check out the Fickle Peach. Many of my friends that are fans of the Heorot, but not quite as commited as I am, have told me how great the Peach is…So, I felt it warranted at least being checked into.

So, I met up with Chris S. and we hit the Fickle Peach on a Thursday night. One of the first things I observed upon walking into the establishment was the flat screen TV. Basketball was on the tube…this would not happen up the street at the Heorot. The conversation with the bartender and other patrons focused on Ball State athletics. Again, this is something that would not happen at the Heorot. Also, the establishment appeared to be clean…the kind of place you wouldn’t worry about taking your wife to. Um, do I really need to say that the Heorot has the “less-than-clean” atmosphere nailed down?

Anyway, Chris and I bellied up to the bar. He enjoyed the Guinness while I went for the Bell’s Two-Hearted Ale (there was a special on Bell’s that evening). Both beers were presented very nicely (the head of the Guinness had a clover drawn into it). I’m a big fan of the Two-Hearted, so I was delighted to find it on tap.

A great evening was had by all.

So, overall, I enjoyed the Fickle Peach. But, I’d have to be in the mood for it. If I’m looking for a place to watch a game and talk sports, the Peach would win out over Scotty’s, B-Dub’s, and the like. However, if I’m looking for conversation that does not involve sports and a ridiculously huge beer list, the Heorot wins out. Let me say, the Fickle Peach may not have quite the list that the Heorot does…however, the beers they do offer are high quality (well, I think I did notice a couple of crappy ones on the list…probably there to make the Muncie NASCAR fans happy).

So, after giving a bit of a rant about my dislike of church newsletters, I found the following article on the Church Relevance website:

Article About Effective Communication

I think many of us realize that the culture around us is advancing at a great pace in the technological arena. Generally, the church tends to be way behind. So, wouldn’t it be great to see the church make effective adjustments before it’s too late???

I’m going to be honest here…I can’t stand church newsletters! There, I said it.

Every month, I have to sit down and come up with some random thoughts to put down on the “Associate Pastor” page of the newsletter. It’s better than my last church…we had a weekly newsletter and were expected to have something every week. So, once a month isn’t that big of a deal.

But, I’ll be honest again…I never read church newsletters. Sometimes I’ll skim through them when I don’t have any other reading material for the bathroom. But, usually they go straight to the trash. Emily doesn’t really read them either.

See, the newsletter is supposed to be a form of communication. But, it seems to be ineffective. We put stuff in there, send it out, and then hear, “Hey, I never knew about ____.” When you point out that it’s been in the newsletter, bulletin, and announcements for the last 3 months, the blank stare is often associated with, “Huh, I guess I missed that.”

Okay, so there are some folks that read the newsletter. But, I believe it should be something that church members can opt in or out of. If you don’t read the newsletter, opt out so that we don’t waste the postage. If you do read the newsletter, opt in. Or, make an e-version of the newsletter that people can simple delete or add to their spam senders list.

All right, that’s enough about newsletters. I finished my article…it sucks…but hey, is any one going to read it???